Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Keeping Busy

It's very easy to make Hodgkins my full time job--but in fact, it's only a part time job. Yesterday I had a conference call for this freelance gig I'm working on, and we spent a very intense two hours going over stuff. (I am so not a team player. Being a novelist has made me cranky and used to my solitude. But they put up with me.) After I hung up the phone, I was feeling good and sharp, and for the first time since Thursday, I was hungry. Bob and I went out and got Japanese food and I made him stop for ice cream. Okay, it was easy to make him stop, but I did have to make him.

Came home, ate my ice cream, and was suddenly so deeply tired I staggered when I walked. So I went to bed.

Jeanette, the oncology nurse, says 'Go with the flow,' and since Adam is nineteen and my job is part time, I can. But balance is really hard to learn. I'm inherently lazy. Left to my own devices I would read books, watch TV, play solitaire, eat...anything but tackle real work. If I do that, I get blah and unhappy. I'm trying to get out and do, but when the fatigue hits, it's like a fever coming on. I'm fine and then five minutes later I'm punch drunk. And every two weeks, the equation changes.

Of course, the real answer to this is...what would the miniature dachshund do? She'd insist that the world revolve around her.

Poor Bob.

Shelly and Smith


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